Daddy Daughter Date - Safari

(Dan ) Today Helen woke up with a fever. She decided to try to seep it off. So Mei Mei and I went on a DDD- Safari. 

 

 This is my second time here and I still am amused at the men's bathroom. 

It's like peeing at Tarzan's house. Almost refreshing.

Train ride!

She is so pretty! I'm in trouble.

 

YEA! Interaction and some kind of response is good. 

Mei Mei was not a huge fan of the scary Chinese Robot man.

We'll have to enhance her SciFi experience.

 

Ever see a monkey bob for children?

 

 "The pteranodon will show off it's yawn ant time you request it, 

Both you and your chair will fit inside there, 

although I would suggest it."

The dinosaur exhibit started harmless enough with baby dinosaurs mixed with live animals and step by step they started to get larger and larger.  Just after we passed the full size triceratop the encounter took a dramatic turn with dinosaurs spitting poisonus venom (water) while you get the feeling of being hunted by valosarapters moving in from multiple locations. As the music and billows of steam intended to climax with us being trapped in a cave with two fighting full size T-Rexes fighting each other and the only way out was to pass between them.

Dinosaurs were too scary and so we covered ears and eyes and made a run for it.

I'm kind of sorry that I didn't pause to take more pictures.I guess the father button went off.

This reenactment at the end got her to laugh.

China is sure proud of their panda's 

 I had nothing what so ever to do with this..... maybe.

 

Scary Clown! Made me wrestle a tiger. I was called out of the audience with two skinny girls to have a tug of war with a white tiger. Of course we lost, but we put up a good fight and made a great memory.

and we got our tiger prize! (not the hats just the key chains)

Uh no I thought a stuffed animal tigers head, mounted on the wall plaque at the zoo 

was not unusual at all?

Free Day

(Helen) Today was a free day so we headed over to Shamian Island. Their is a place that does laundry (Michael's is great!) so we thought we'd go over and pick it up. We got there and realized that our laundry was still at the hotel. Long story short we got it taken care of and we should have clean laundry tomorrow. Anyway not much to talk about, we did a lot of walking today I'm so glad the weather has been nice. It's kind of sad, we haven't taken as many pictures this time around, maybe because Mei Mei doesn't like the camera and maybe because it's not really new... I need to be better so Mei Mei can have it when she's older. Tomorrow we are going to the zoo, I'm sure it will be entertaining, what else can you expect when you combine Dan and the zoo?

I'm trying to think of something funny to say but I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

 What's so funny?

 A bit of blings!

Once I caught a baby this BIG!

Almost a smile.

Finding courage within.

Brave enough to try!

If only she knew what kind of father she has.

It's the shirt! Go Cougars!

What half of America ignores is obvious to the rest of the world.

(Obama Mao)

A little too serious!

Passport Pictures and Medical Check

(Helen) Today got off with a late start, I'm usually up and ready for the day at 7, but I had a hard night because of a cold, so I didn't wake up until 7. I thought of my girls and that I needed to Skype them, and then I remembered that they were on their way home and that they would be Skyping them from a different place. Once Dan got things in place we Skyped the girls and then I felt ready to start the day. Mei Mei also started the day off late, she woke up crying but we were expecting that... although before she wanted to just stay in the safety of her bed now she wanted to be out with us so that's good right? It would be so frustrating to not be able to communicate! poor kid!

Down at breakfast she stayed in her seat (a first) not without a bit of complaining but she did it! We went back to the to room and got our paper work and baby stuff and headed out to do Mei Mei's visa picture and medical check. It was really crazy where they did the medical check, their were so many family there. All the agencies had a big push to get these families though so they could get home for the holidays. So we all got in lines and waited, and waited!

Mei Mei pointed a few times, she saw one of the families giving high fives to their little girl and so I tried to give her fives and she smiled and thought that was great. So that was my first smile, things are improving... They have 3 stations at the medical check, they do a ENT (ear, nose and throat) a weight, height and temperature check and the last one was physical check. Mei Mei wasn't to happy about any of them! The last one was the worst, the doctor checked out her scar on her bottom and poked around with her tummy. They asked about BMs and then they asked if she could walk, I had to tell them that I didn't know about the walking thing. I said that on the paper work it told us that she could but I have yet to see her walk. Dan had taken her out to start dressing her when were brought them back in. Dan sat on the floor with her, helped her stand while I held out my arms and she walked very slow and cautiously to me, another first! We have asked a lot of her today, she also ate a few new things she's never tried, HAO BUNG (good job) baby!

We are now back at the hotel room with baby asleep, and a paper work meeting in a few hours and then maybe we'll go shopping later. We had 5 other families join us today, they never have been to the Sha Main island so we thought we'd show them the place...
The meeting went a little longer than planned, so there isn't a whole lot of time. Tomorrow we have a free day so maybe we'll go to the island then. We decided to go the the store and get a few things for baby, we went hungry, never a good idea. While at the store Mei Mei perked up when she saw the candy. We even got a big grin when she was presented with a bag of M&M's. We found a few things to bring back to friends, IF they last that long. I've decided that some foods you enjoy much more when you don't know what is in them...

(Dan) Tonight I saw more of her sweet disposition as I took Mei Mei for a walk down to the play ground. She continues to give her trust very slowly, but as we walked around, I would say the names of things in English. Tree, bush, water, rock, slide, swing, woman, man. Instead of hiding her face in my shoulder she listen and watched; by the time we got  up to our room, I said bye bye to a floor attendant and Mei Mei added her bye bye and waved. (That's a three-point shot just when you needed it.)

Baiyun Mountains

Dan
Today was another wait day. It seems that these are the days when we bond to our children the most. This morning the HOLT staff came to Skype with Big sister and Baby cakes. It is so rewarding for them to see the results of their hard work. They see the children at their worst and try to balance the worries fears and emotions of parents not to mention all the government bureaucracy that we do not see. These people are so amazing! Angels on earth. We can't help to have very tender feelings for them.

HEADS UP to new families. Starting in January all children two years and older will have to have a blood test for TB. The pharmaceutical company that made the TB test is no longer making it and government officials just made the ruling. Medical expenses will be passed on to families.

Today we walked through a food market and tried to guess at what we are looking at. We never see the raw form of these foods and it was fun to smell and guess. Of course there were plenty of unusual foods: lots of fish, rows of skinned ducks and one of the more disturbing was a pile of fried chicklets.

We ate at Subway!

We also visited the Baiyun Mountains which are beautifully wooded mountians just north of the city in Guangzhou.  They have a cable car that took us up and a long golf cart that took us down. At the top is a Buddah temple and a bird zoo. They have constructed a park with a next that expands several archers. We saw all kinds of birds and a bird show. Mei Mei seem to come alive as long as we kept moving.

Today, I think we fingered out a little more about our Mei Mei. Too much attention and stimulation causes her to shut down. The crowds and noises overload her. I find it interesting that the fluff we focus on, TV, fashion, music etc. brings no fulfillment but a quiet walk through the trees will open up the mind and heal. We would all be happier if we took more time and turned off our gadgets to ponder.

We ate dinner at Oggi's an Italian restaurant. My noodles were really good. Then we got turned around and wandered the city streets lost. Lots of eyes on us. Finally flagged down a taxi and made it back to the Hotel. Helen was pretty tired.

(Helen) We the Holt ladies came up we got to talk to them a little more about Mei Mei, they said that most likely (like Dan said) she is just getting to much  stimulation, we are trying to kill her with kindness. She is use to just being in her bed, it's her safe place. So today when we were not out and about she was in her crib. I went and sat by her so that she knew I was there, we were playing with her and threw a bunch of balloons in with her, we went to take them out and she made it known that she wanted them in there with her, so we left them in for a while. 

It was a much better day today, when we were out we saw her wave at a few people and she pointed at the birds and that was encouraging., small steps right? She still wants to be held a lot, probably because she can't walk, so my shoulder muscles are objecting... I get to build up my muscles again, I just hope that they don't just stop working like they have in the past. This too will pass... One more week and we'll be headed home and I can see my beautiful girls, I miss them!

Nooooo! not Sha Main Island

Dan

Our China adventures are starting to get extreme. Today we took a taxi all by ourselves back to Sha Main island! As you can see above Mei Mei shares the same option about the island as I did last time. This will shock Grandma who listened to me complain last time we adopted that I was trapped on that island and wanted to go any where but there.  I was surprised how comfortable I felt. A lot of the same friends were there and we were happy to sit and eat a familiar meal.

SHOPPING UPDATE - This next part is for those who are familiar with the island or who will be going to the island and are adopting.  If you are not interested, you can skip down.

The streets and building are beautiful and the White Swan has been gutted. The first 5 floors are missing the exterior walls. So pretty major renovations.

We stopped at Judy's place who is a Chinese christian woman and she and Helen had become good friends when we were here to get Baby Cakes. She was happy and surprised that we had come back and told us that she was hoping to have another baby.

Emma's was gone and the young man had up'ed the prices on just about everything. Of course there a "good price for you" if you'll buy more. We moved along.

Michael's is still the best price for laundry and he will come to the China Hotel to pick up and drop off laundry. if you'll cover the taxi costs. So worth it! Inventory has dropped off but there are still plenty of  artistic treasures.

At Jenny's, I was excited to see she had birthday candles. Our friends found them in Nanchung and we have been watching for them. It adds great pyrotechnics to any birthday celebration. Jenny's continues to have beter quality stuff. She remembered us and was very kind as always.

We love the store "A Gift from China" - which was open.  They have good quality items and they target christian market. We were able to get some beautifully crafted pieces and they do well to help orphans.

We even walked down to the subway to look around. We learned that at any given time the subway has at least two million people on it. I'm hoping that Helen will be brave and ride the subway with me. I had no idea that it tunnels through out the entire city.

Today - we still had plenty of tears, Momma wanted to spare everyone at breakfast. But through out the day we managed to take a few more baby steps. We got her to stand and even walk with assistance  and she'll now sit up on her own. (Not with out complaining but .... at least she is not flopping over) helen and I were thinking that mentally she is two and physically she more like 8-9 months. We tried the slide and I got her to ride on daddy's shoulders.

Off to PBS to apply for Passports

Dan

Today we walked through the park and got to the children's play ground only to find that it was closed. It has rained everyday that we have been here which is unusual for the season. Still the walk was nice and it is better than being stuck in our room. We walked with Nancy and Brian and their cute little family. Talking about life and family seems to help. We see other family each has different situations and different challenges.

You would think that staying in a nice hotel in China would more of a vacation than a burden, but there is a huge physical and emotional burden while the children adjusts. Add the sameness of your surroundings from food and locations and the long hours of waiting is harder than most understand. But when you make the trip, you do understand and there is a common bond that is formed. We try to laugh when we can and always encourage each other.

"Everybody needs a sneed" -- from the Lorax

I think that is why adoption families tend to attract each other. Enduring a common situation forges bonds. I'm getting to the point that I can tell how long a family has been in China based upon the look on their face.  The longer the duration it tends to drag you down. There is the I have been here 10 days look, the one more week look  and then the spark of energy and hope when they realize that they are going home tomorrow.

Once you are home and no longer at the mercy of regulations and schedules is when tend to see our spirits lift and soar. We are not meant to be commanded in all things but to soar as captains of our own soul.

Mei Mei fell asleep in the park while I was holding her and she fell asleep at PBS and she is asleep again this afternoon. (which is why I have time to type). Today we tried to see what her limits were physically. We saw picture of her standing, but we have never seen her walk. I'm not sure if she has ever crawled either. We have to prop her up to do either and then she will not move, but only cry. I starting to believe that she has been carried all her life. We did some exercises of her legs and arms but it is slow and she is still getting use to us.

Today I felt that I needed to give her a blessing. In it she was blessed to begin to have healing both physically and emotionally. She is uncomfortable and we'll help her. I felt too that Heavenly Father is blessing Helen and me too. We both cried as the spirit confirmed that she is our daughter and part of our family. Knowing this makes all the difference. The questions of doubt that makes you fear if things will be OK goes away and we find that despite the behavior we can love her.

Today we can pass her back and forth without crying and she feels comfortable to fall asleep with me. I even snuck in a kiss and she didn't object this time.  Deep breaths and patience. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

Helen (Dan said write something funny)
I overcame one of my fears about China today... I used a squatty potty, your pretty impressed I can tell! ... I'll leave the humor up to Dan...

Adoption Finalization

Today we went back to the civil affairs office to finalize things with the adoption, she is ours!! Tomorrow we work on passports, but for now we are just taking it easy in the hotel room. Janeyi is down for a nap and so is Dan. Me I'm happy to have my fingers on a warm keyboard... I have been so cold here. It is winter in Guangzhou, it's not like winter at home, it's very humid, and it's chilling me to the bone! It has been raining on and off since we've been here and I'm missing the sun! So enough about me you all want to hear about Janeyi, she is doing a little better. I think things will take some time. We went to the store and got a few things, I found her a ball, and it's not by chance that her name means sphere, globe, or ball. She loves balls! She seemed pleased about the ball. Although things have been a little better, it's still seems discouraging...

Sometimes I forget that she is almost 2 because she is so small, and then she'll say thank you in Chinese and I remember that she is still holding back on what she really can do. So we wait, and try to be there for her to grieve in her own way, letting her know that's it's ok and that she is not alone in this big change.

This morning we skyped the girls back home and it took me by surprise how emotional it was for me, I miss my girls so much. And it made me realize how much I took for granted how easy their gotcha days were. Love you my Bao Bei's.

Dan
It is probably my imagination, but there is a lot of grieving with this one. It's been a hard day. She doesn't want to do anything for herself not even sit up. She cries if she is left alone and cries if we pay attention to her. She always wants to be held, but doesn't want me to look at her. She won't stand or walk and resists any effort to do anything on her own.  Building trust is slow and Helen says,"I don't think that she likes us".

She pouches food and we know that she is hungry, yet she will not chew food and will not hold a bottle. It's been hard. We put her down for a nap and prayed that when she woke up it would be better, but she cried when she saw us and doesn't want us to pick her up.

If we change anything she cries. clothes, diapers, hand her a toy, if I sing, music, TV, wipe her nose, take a picture all results in tears.  Then about  3:00 PM she perked up and showed interest in being outside. She points and talks and even laughs when I stop a little boy from running away from his mother and charging out into a busy street.

5:00 PM we realize that we've forgotten how to make the bottles (little too watery) and the second bottle she downed in no time. We got her to sit and play a bit on the floor and realize that she can stand and all this may not be physical but frustrations.

6:30 PM We gave each other a break and took turns watching Mei Mei while the other ate. I got her ready for bed and showed her some love and she let me give it. We watch some TV and played and then said prayers we put her to bad about 7:30 PM.

This has given me another reason why judging others serves no purpose. We don't know what others are really going through and even if we do, spectator coaching is not the same as having to make the shot in the game. A little reflection is good while the other team is on time out.

We are missing the children who actually like us. (Still working on the video)