Quiet Contemplation/Tender Mercies

Its been a week and 3 days (I'm not anxious at ALL) since we went and had our fingerprints taken for immigration. Once that is completed we send them off to the Chinese consulate back in D.C. Last night after the two treasures were put to bed I sat down and was reading with Mr. D. While he was reading I kept thinking of our baby in China. I was both here and in China, it was a rather odd feeling. I was walking the streets in Guangzhou, feeling anxious. I think that most people once they get to Guangzhou where the U.S. consulate is they do feel anxious just to things done and to head home and get on with life as new parents. I don't know if I'm feeling anxious because part of my heart is in China or when we leave I'll be leaving a part of my heart at home... I've never left my girls that long and Babycakes I've never left more and a hour or two at a time... With that said, and shifting gears a bit that experience made me reflect on some of the experiences I have had with adopting Babycakes and Mei Mei. Even before Babycakes was conceived by her birth mother she was mine, let me explane. We waited just over 3 1/2 years for her and it was only 2 months after we got home from China with our oldest that I had an experience where I knew we were to start the process over again to bring her home, and that she was waiting for us. Along the long(not as long as some)road of waiting I saw her face and often felt her near, that was such a tender mercy for me at that time. I remember one night being woke up from a dead sleep hearing "Mama", I asked Mr. D if big sister was ok and he went and checked in on her and she was asleep. I thought maybe I was just hearing things. As I was falling asleep again I heard once again "mama" and I knew it was her. Is it a just by chance that she was at the age that they start saying "mama", I don't think so... With little Mei Mei we thought we were done, but there was a day I just kept looking for someone that wasn't there and knew that that God was sending another little treasure to China for us to love. I have felt her presence and more than anything thing I hear her cry, maybe that's some of the reason for the anxiousness. When you hear your baby cry you reach out for it and try to make things better... obviously it's a little harder, but I know that God loves and cares for these little ones, and for me that is very comforting! These girls have always been mine, they have come from across the sea, for reasons only God knows and for now I'm at peace knowing he is the master artist who is in the process of making more out of me and my little family than I can. I wonder what kind of colors Mei Mei will bring to my canvas? Anyone who knows Mr. D and Big Sister know that thigs are very colorful around here! For all those who are waiting know that I pray for you, waiting is hard, but their is purpose in all things! Someone remind me of that tomorrow, I'll need it!

Here is our Babycakes a couple of days after we got her. After 3 1/2 years of waiting for we changed from a standard match to a "special needs" child, it's crazy what China considers  "special needs", did you know that if a child needs glasses its considered "special needs"? It was 2 weeks after we changed what we got our match, and within 3 months she was in our arms! If you are thinking about it, talk to your agency, these little ones need a loving home too! We are going the same route with MeiMei. Happy Easter Everyone!